My Lazyboy chair

Some pictures: left, our dear friends, the Lotze and us having a last dinner together

2) Kids eating ice cream on the trampoline (we had silence for a few moments!)

3) Andries with very tired boys Ivan on his lap and Hugo next to him

4) Pics of our wonderful care group who helped clean the flat before our move to the new house (I know I know, old news, just new picks!)

The very first time I went for chemo I picked out a chair. A nice maroon colour Lazyboy chair. Ever since that day I go and sit in the same chair for the administering of each session of the chemo drugs. When I go for blood tests I pick other chairs. Why do you think that is? I am not afraid of change but feel content, comfortable and brave in this specific Lazyboy. My space next to a bright big window. In a way it is a symbol of hope, of getting better very soon. A giant teddy bear hugging me.

Today was number six out of eight. I feel so happy that I am 75% there. I saw the oncologist yesterday and she feels very confident about the shrinking lump. According to her I am responding very well to the chemo. I feel so blessed to be under her care. She is a brilliant doctor and so concerned about my well being - physically and emotionally. We'll know for sure about the lump after tests when the chemo is complete.

It was with a sad heart that we had to say goodbye to very dear friends - Francois, Liezel, Anya and Karla. They are on their way back to SA after 10 years in the UK. First they had a great holiday touring through France and Spain and ending their holiday in Mauritius - yes, life can be hard... ;-). The Lord has blessed us immensely with these people. We are going to miss them so much! And if you ever need information about on a great day out in London or where to stay in the UK for holiday, Liezel is a fantastic source of information - she knows all there is to know! But we wish them well and hope the return to SA will be as smooth as possible!

But it is with very happy hearts that we are enjoying every moment of my parent's visits. They are working hard and I appreciate everything that they are doing to help me in the process of getting better. This coming weekend we will show them a bit more of the hustle and bustle of London.

Thanks again for all the messages of hope, good luck and well wishes. It warms my heart and spirit and is definitely helping to get me better! XXX

It's Christmas, again!

It's Christmas again! My mom and dad are on their way for a two week visit (well, under visit you must understand: play with kids, taking Hugo to playgroup, babysit, cook, clean and get Lourika better). We are very excited for them! This will be their first overseas trip ever. I think the journey from the airport to the house will probably blow them away!

I feel very privileged to have all these people coming from SA to help with the kids and the household. As I stated previously - there is just no way I would have been able to do and cope so well with the chemo, side effects and the emotional stuff if it weren't for family and friends that just gave up time, money and (lots of!) energy. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I went in for some blood tests yesterday to see if my body is recovering well after the first administration of Taxol. And I passed the test. I feel so blessed that after every chemo the white blood cells are doing their job. I have to admit that the injection I receive every Friday after the Wednesday chemo is doing all the hard work.

Hugo starts playgroup again this coming Monday. Good for him, bad for me if he is going to bring home all his friend's germs. Lets all keep our fingers crossed that I will stay healthy for the last three session with no "glitches" in the road. But I am excited for him. He is really looking forward to go to Rainbow Playgroup!

Well, let the weekend hit the road - lots to do and see before my Wednesday date with Harley street cancer clinic. XXXXX

My 3rd Argus

This week feels as if I completed my third Argus Cycle Race - aches and pains all over! I can clearly remember the day after my first Argus - my knees hurt so much I could barely walk. This week I feel the same, though every day is 100% better then the previous.

This round of chemo, and for the next three rounds, I am receiving Taxol. One of the main side effects are aching or pain in joints and muscles. Luckily, only for a few days. The other side effect, numbness or tingling in hands and feet worry me more, because those can take up to a few months to go away. But these are all temporary.

Last Saturday I met a four year old little boy, Owen. All friendly and smiles. Owen had a brain tumor that was removed and is currently receiving very intense chemo. He has to be in hospital for this. My heart wanted to break into a million pieces when I listened to his mom telling his story. He is doing well, but each new day holds new information and a lot of times not so good. It was then that I realised that I'd rather travel this road myself then to see one of my children go through this. And yet, we have no control over this. It can happen to anyone at any time.

That is why it is so important to be sensitive, all the time. You never know what someone is going through unless you walked a day in their shoes. This cancer road has definitely taught me that.

I hope everyone in sunny South Africa is having a fantastic spring day. And that the good weather for the day will be an indication of a blissful summer lying ahead! Enjoy every moment!

Only three to go!

Yes! Only three more chemos to go. Yesterday was number five and all went well. I was a bit anxious at first. I started on Taxol and sometimes (though very rare) you can experience bad allergic reactions. For this purpose, they gave me some anti-histamine that made me very drowsy so I took a snooze or two while I was at it. The side-effects are also less so I am hoping for the best!

On Tuesday I had appointments with the oncologist and the breast surgeon. Both of them are very excited - they can't feel the lump under the arm and are struggling to feel the lump in the breast. (After further tests they could see that the lump in the breast is more in the region of 4cm in diameter and not two). This is great news, I am responding very well to the chemo and we are only halfway. Praise the Lord for this wonderful news!!!

Our dear friend Hannelie arrived last Saturday and she is like a tonic to my system. Before her arrival I felt a bit down in the dumps. I was more ill than with the previous rounds and I think if your body is not doing so well, emotionally you are also a bit off. But that only lasted a day or two.

Don't know if I've told you before (sorry if I repeat information - blame it on chemo-brain. Much worse than preggie-brain!), my sister-in-law, Marianne, gave me this big bag full of prezzies. It is a clear bag with brightly wrapped chemo-gifts. After every chemo I am allowed to open one gift. This way I can see the pile getting smaller, thus fewer chemo sessions that remain. Thanks Marianne, this is always something to look forward to when I arrive home, looking grey and tired and off-beat after the session.

We are planning to go to Cambridge this coming Saturday. Hugo and Ivan have a birthday party to attend and we want to take a good stroll through the town. Everyone says it is really beautiful. I hope I feel well enough to join in on the fun.

Thanks again for all the prayers and well wishes. I appreciate it so much! I hope you all have a great week and nice things planned for the weekend. We have a bank holiday on Monday, so it's a long weekend for us!

The two Camerons I know

Today I want to tell you about the two Camerons I know.

The first is Cameron Van Den Burgh, the SA swimming sensation. I used to teach him at Cornwall Hill College, back when we was in grade 9. Accounting and EMS (Economic and Management Sciences). He was always one of the most polite, well-mannered pupils I have ever taught. It doesn't even surprise me that he is doing so well. I am so proud of his achievements!

The second Cameron is Cameron Reyburn - My little BIG hero! Cameron is the first born son to our very good friends Murray and Dalene. He is only three days younger than Ivan.

Cameron was born with bilateral congenital cataracts. He has underwent many examinations under anesthetics and had operations. Always being so brave!

We "catch up" on news of his progress via his blog (where we got the idea of starting our own blog - thanks Cam!). He is doing so well and is reaching milestones right on time! He is even going to a mainstream play school. He is blessed with a bunch of great people that is helping him in so many ways. Every time I read about his daily life and all the things he is up to, my heart swells with pride. It is such a privilege to know this little boy. When I feel down in the dumps, I think of his bright smile!

Cameron Reyburn is indeed my little BIG hero - with a heart of gold and the courage of a lion. I learn so much from him. And maybe the most important lesson, to be like a child again. To enjoy the simple, little things in life. And to take these things on with a child-like enthusiasm and excitement.

Luke 18:15-17 'Jesus called them to him, saying, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it."

Let's all be like children again.

A cloudy start to the day

This morning it was clouds all over - in the sky and in my heart. My parents-in-law had to go home this morning. I cried. I don't cry a lot usually, but I already miss them so much. They were such a blessing, Mom for 35 days and Dad for two weeks. They helped me so much with the household and boys. But also on an emotional and spiritual level. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!".(Ivan being awake for two hours during the night and today my blue-Saturday after chemo and very good friends on their way back to SA after 10 years in the UK also didn't help with the tears!).

But, alas, the sun came out and I felt better. Life goes on and we need to 'Carpe Diem!', as my stunning husband would say. So that's what we did. After a relaxed late-morning we went for some quick shopping and that always makes me feel better.

In a week's time a very good friend is coming out from SA to help for two weeks. I can't wait to see her! We are probably going to be up most nights to chat and chat and chat. I've missed her so much!

Smiles from my toes

Chemo number four is overs-cadovers!! I am very relieved and happy that I've reached the halfway mark. I took cup cakes to celebrate this occasion and the nurses enjoyed every bit. They are all doing such a great job and try to make every patient as comfortable as possible.

Now I honestly have to say the chemo has not been as bad as the movie "Dying Young" with Julia Roberts. I feel a bit grey and look pale from the Wednesday of the treatment and this lasts to the Sunday. The Saturday is my low point. I think that it's because of the injection that I receive on a Friday morning to help build up the white blood cells and my immunity. By the next Wednesday I feel 100% human again and one week later when I feel in tip-top condition, they hit me with another session. Next time the doctor will add a drug called Taxol. This will add about three hours to the treatment session.

Speaking of Roberts-ladies, I made a cancer friend trough my dad-in-law, Fiona Roberts. They used to be colleagues at Sasol. She, as so many other woman are my inspiration. Their stories of courage and bravery warms my heart every day.

Fiona was diagnosed with breast cancer before the age of 30, busy planning her wedding. Her most beautiful day. She went through six sessions of chemo, the operation and radio therapy. At the end she had her big day and afterwards the blessing of children (which is a big thing because 50% of woman receiving chemo are left sterile after treatment). Today she is in remission (no signs of cancer)! I am so proud of her!

She sent me an e-mail after hearing about my situation. I was so glad that she got hold of me. She gave me invaluable advise and encouraged me so much before the road started. She also sent a gift - nail polish! She said to put it on my toe nails, so that every time I look down I will be receiving ten smiles back! So, while I travel this road of cancer treatment I'll be wearing my red nail polish and receiving my ten smiles a few times each day!

Thank you all again for my lovely messages - this, together with prayers from all over are really carrying me trough this journey! XXX