Chocolate

Photos from the top: the boys swimming; Race for Life and my mates from Rainbow Play Group, My "Race for life for..." poster; Hugo, Ivan and mummy on my birthday; LL and Karen came to visit!

Today, for the first time I tasted Lindt Chocolate with a hint of sea salt. I found it very metaphoric of my life the past month.

On the 24th of June I celebrated my birthday, in Greenwich Park with the three loves of my life. We had a great picnic and every moment of that day I felt so blessed and thankful to actually have that birthday. You see, in 2009, on the 24th of June, I wished that the next 365 days would fly by and indeed it did. I was so happy to celebrate my 34th birthday. Indeed, the day tasted like my favourite chocolate.

June was also a month filled with great UK weather, excursions to the park and train rides. Not even to mention a proper braai just about four times a week. We have also decided to move home and were looking at places in Wimbledon, Putney, Raynes Park. Unfortunately we did not find a suitable dwelling and decided to stay in the Docklands area, where we know lots of people, the boys can continue going to Rainbow Play Group and we can carry on at church as normal. Our good friends LL en Karen Coetzee came to visit for three days. It was wonderful to show them our part of our little UK.

But early July I tasted the salt in my chocolate. We had to say goodbye to a great friend and colleague, Magdel Lotz. She lost her battle against cancer. She put up the bravest fight I have ever seen, always smiling, always looking so beautiful, always being positive and optimistic. I learned so much from her. She was a fantastic teacher, great motivator and a friend through thick and thin. The realisation of this hit home when I did my third Race for Life event at Blackheath. My poster read "Race for life for Magdel....", I had to change that to "In loving memory of Magdel.....". This was so hard to do. But I know she is now in a place where her illness is no more and pain and tears are gone forever. She was such an amazing woman that I believe the Lord couldn't wait any longer to have her with Him, He has great plans......

In four weeks time Andries' mom and dad will be arriving for an eight week holiday! We are very excited and can't wait for the cups of tea we're going to drink together! They are also spoiling Andries and me with nine days of bliss - looking after the boys while we are off to Italy. I can't wait!

There are boxes to be packed and papers to sort through. I am very excited for our new home and the adventures that lies ahead!

Six-month clear

This last week was quite busy. The highlight however was on Tuesday when I've received the six-month "all clear". After some blood tests the week before, Dr. Jones, my oncologist, seemed very satisfied with the results. The medication I am taking, and in all probability for the next 20 months, has it's side effects. This is medication prescribed for breast cancer patients as well as woman struggling to fall pregnant. I can see and feel the effects as my cycle follows it's hormonal journey every month. But, my doctor wasn't ready for me to just stop using it and for the time being I just have to cope with the slight discomfort.

I felt very anxious the day before the appointment - you just never know what the results are going to say. It was a great relief to hear her say "everything is fine and the blood results look great". She confirmed yet again that my results after the operation, which was a pathological complete remission, is the best possible result you can hope for. Auxiliary involvement (the amount of lymph nodes also affected by cancer) is a very good indicator for future recurrence. The more nodes involved, the bigger the changes. Literature suggest that with four or more lymph nodes effected, your chances of recurrence or even metastases (when the cancer spreads to other body parts like the liver or bones) jumps to 60%. In my situation we do not know how many nodes where initially involved, but only that they (or maybe just one...) tested positive. The pathology report however shows a good and positive outcome with regards to recurrence.

But with the days in between we feel very home sick, especially when experiencing the Soccer World Cup from so far away. Yet, we feel so proud so be South African in these trying times. We're having a family long weekend in a UK CenterParcs resort (Longleat, close to Bath), It's similar to an up market Aventura resort - a lovely facility where you can get back to nature, ride a bike all weekend long and just relax.

Today was also my middle sister Karien's thirtieth birthday (Happy, Happy!) as well as my dear friend Santie's little Sune's third birthday. And it is just days like these that you wish you were so much closer to home. I miss all of them dearly!

Hope you have a great weekend and enjoy the soccer - or football as we refer to it here in the UK ;-)

Today, one year

Today, one year ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It's been a journey filled with pain, tears, but also healing, hope and love. A journey I wish upon NO ONE, but one I wouldn't have wanted any other way. Thank you so much for every prayer of healing, positive thought and story of hope - it carried me through every moment.

To God all the glory for the miracle of healing!

To Andries and my beautiful two boys, Hugo and Ivan - every step was worth it to be able to be longer with you.

To all our wonderful family and friends - you've been the wings that carried us with the diagnoses, every chemo session, the operation and the times in-between.

Don't let fear ever get the best of you. We can only live in the moment. Let our yesterdays make us wise and let our tomorrows make us courageous. Lets love unconditionally and live life to the fullest, in our todays.

Race for Life

Photos from the top: (1) Warming up (2) Running for my dear friends (3) My three biggest supporters (4) Crossing the finish line (5) Ivan, Hugo & I

Today I completed my first 5km Race for Life Challenge - I had an amazing time! The event was held at the O2 Dome in Greenwich, the first one ever at the O2 and also the first of the season. There are various events all over the UK during summer time and approximate 730 000 entries are expected in 2010.

Race for Life is an UK cancer research organisation. The aim is to raise as much as possible money to continue the great work doctors and scientists are doing in life-saving research into causes of cancer. In 2009 they raised 65 million pounds. As a five month breast cancer survivor, I know I benefited a great deal from this.

You get a race-number to wear on the front of your shirt and a bright pink card for you back that reads: "I race for life for:....." - well, I did it for my dear friends Magdel and Anneliese. It was quite an emotional morning for me and it touched me deeply that my three greatest fans were there, Andries, Hugo and Ivan. Last week Sunday was the annual London marathon and our church were involved with one of the water stations. Both Hugo and Ivan shouted "hou-bene-hou! hou-bene-hou!" to just about all the runners. Today was no different and my little men were very impressed that mommy completed a "marathon"(we explained it was just a tiny little mini-marathon!).

I also entered one for the 4th of July. A bunch of moms and staff from Hugo's play school are also taking part. This one will be all around the beautiful Greenwich Park. The other one I entered is in Regent's Park - the park right at the cancer clinic where I received my chemo as well as the London Clinic where I was hospitalised for the operation and recovery. Both my doctors work in Harley Street, very close to the park.

As earlier mentioned, today is my five-month-in-remission-anniversary. I feel so blessed and often overwhelmed by the goodness, grace and love bestowed upon us by our Lord and God. I feel so excited and positive about the future!

Back home - in London

(Photos from the top: kids and myself (my hair is not the shortest anymore!); Andries and the boys, visit and lekker braai with great friends; cousins on Andries' side; with my sister Karien's boy, James, also two)

We've been back home in London for 10 days now. A hectic 10 days. I didn't sleep on the plane home at all and it took me the better part of three days to get my head and spirit ready for the next leg of our stay.

We had a fantastic time in South Africa - wish we could stay longer and see more people. We will have to come and make up at a later stage....

While visiting SA I saw a physiotherapist that specialises in the treatment of lymphoedema. Lymphoedema is a risk due to treatment of breast cancer. Lymph is a colourless fluid which forms in the body and is normally drained. Lymph nodes acts as filters and also play an important part in the body's defence against infection by removing excess protein, dead or abnormal cells and bacteria. If this drainage becomes blocked or damaged, lymph will accumulate in the tissue and swelling occurs. Lymhoedema can lead to changes in the tissue such as hardness and an increased risk of infection. The swelling can then become even more difficult to control. In my situation, where 18 lymph nodes were removed, lymphoedema will always be an issue. The therapist suggested that I wear an arm sock on the flight back to the UK and also on days when I am going to use the arm a lot. She also showed me good exercises to help the muscles encourage the flow of fluid through the vessels.

My sister-in-law also treated me to a fantastic massage session with a lady that specialises in oncology massages. It helped so much to get the swelling of my hand and arm down, not to mention how wonderfully relaxing it was!

I also had an appointment with my breast specialist yesterday, just a check up. All is well and he is satisfied with the results five months post-op. Some days I can't believe that I am so close to the one year mark of my breast cancer diagnosis - it feels super surreal!

Little Hugo is still on school holiday and will be back three hours a morning, five days a week this coming Monday. I've also put Ivan's name down, but he can only go once he turned 30 months (still a while, since he turned two on the 4th of April).

When we arrived in London we were greeted with beautiful flowers all along the road back home as well as marvelous sunshine. The day light hours are also increasing every day and sunset is only around 20:00 in the evenings. If it seems late, wait till June, then the sun only sets around 21:20! But we enjoy very day as it comes. Because every single day will always hold in something beautiful, something special. I hope your next couple of days will also be special and cherished.

Fun in the sun!

As the title is giving away - we are having a fantastic time in SA. It is so good to feel the African sun on our (very!) white, almost see-through UK skins. The boys are playing outside for the most part of the day and are dirty most of the time - a sign of good use of energy.

I have managed a few tea-sessions as well as dinner-dates with friends, a movie and relinking with old friends. Andries is in Singapore at the moment, spending last week in Australia on business. We miss him so much! He was also able to visit with Bernard and Cornelie, very dear friends of ours. And the reports show that they have been spoiling him rotten! Thanks you guys!

I have been on the Tamoxifen drugs for about four weeks. At times it makes me feel horrible (like a menopausal, pregnant, depressed mother of three children under the age of three!). But for most of the time I am tolerating it quite well. I hope that the latter will be the final effect as both specialists are so positive about the drug. It keeps the cancer away from the healthy breast but is apparently also good for bone density and keeping the bad cholesterol low. My oncologist did however warn me that the drug was developed as fertility treatment and that "she doesn't want any little surprises"......

A lot of people are asking us if there will be more children. And the honest answer is that we just don't know. With the information now available to us, the likelihood is small. I have to be on the Tamoxifen for at least two years, although it is recommended for five years. We were also warned that it is best to not fall pregnant for at least two years after the administering of the last chemo. But, as with everything else we are leaving this in God's hands. He will know best....

We are very excited for Andries' arrival this coming Saturday. He will be on leave for a week before we return to London. The last week will be a jam-packed to make sure we see as many friends and family as possible. Our last say in SA will also be the day we celebrate Ivan's second birthday. We can't believe our little baby is growing up so fast!

Thank you again to all who are making this SA-visit so memorable and lovely. It makes it so much harder to return to our temporary home in London.

Thanks to all

We've been in SA for little over a week now. We are enjoying every moment in our beautiful and warm surroundings. Everyone is spoiling us and it is so good to see all our loved ones.

Yesterday we had our thanks-giving event. Thank you to all who were there and also to all who made the day possible. Thank you to everyone who helped with the preparation of the food and to everyone who attended. We feel so grateful and blessed to have you all in our lives.

But the biggest thanks to our heavenly Father - for love, grace and healing.

There are lots of braai and tea appointments. Can't wait!

XXX